how to deal with a meddling future mother-in-law

Ok, you’ve found the man of your dreams.  You’ve got the ring.  What you didn’t realize is that along with that gorgeous man and ring comes his mother…your future mother-in-law.  Sounds cool, right? WRONG! Your future mother-in-law is not the one who keeps her distance and asks, “How high?” when you say, “Jump”. She’s the one that movies are made of.

We’ve all heard the horror stories.  The mother-in-law whose sole mission is to break her son and his fiancé up.  Aside from disagreeing with every decision the bride makes when it comes to the wedding, she’s constantly offering up unwanted advice from how to spend their money to the type of career the bride should have.  Putting the son in an awkward position, he’s going to defend his mother…she did give birth to him after all.  Don’t let his mother get in the middle of you and The One!  Here are some necessary steps to take when it comes to dealing with your future meddling mother-in-law and to ensure that you and your fiancé begin your lives happily:     

First thing’s first: Make sure that you and your fiancé are on the same page.  I promise, this whole process will be so much easier if you approach it as a team and not alone.  
Second on the list: Set your boundaries! Now that you and your fiancé are on the same page, you’ll need to consult about your desired boundaries and how to lay them down. Now is not the time to be petty.  You can’t really stop her from giving unwanted advice but you can ask her to call before she comes over. Also, make sure that your fiancé is the B.S. “Boundary Setter”.  She’ll be more receptive to change if it comes from her son and not you.  

The final step is: Acceptance.  Listen up honey, your mother-in-law isn’t going anywhere.  Waging war against her will only cause heartache for your husband-to-be which ultimately trickles down into your marriage. It is much more fun planning the next twenty-five wonderful years with your husband rather than doing twenty-five to life with your mother-in-law.

It’s about the journey, not the destination…make it a good one!

1 comment:

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